(slow, dramatic music)
- My name is Diana Mitchell, and this
is a picture of my daughter Brooke Mitchell.
In July of 2015, I had the biggest nightmare
when my daughter came to me and told me she
was a heroin addict.
In 17 months, with treatment and trying
to get all the help I could, we lost her on January 2017.
Brooke was pretty much a straight A student, honor roll.
She loved to swim, she was on the swim team
for Northhampton for many years.
She was an avid reader, she loved the movies,
she loved the beach.
She was definitely an amazing person if you knew her.
We're dealing with children, and we're dealing
with parents that have never been through this before.
You have to have some compassion somewhere.
I'm sitting there blindsided, I have no idea what I'm doing.
This is not my life, this is not who this is happening to.
This is happening to me.
We're a middle class family, we work our tails off.
We have a good family, we have a good,
it doesn't happen to, you don't think it happens to you
until it does.
- Your child is a unique person.
They're a unique individual.
They've got unique things that are going on.
And you want to believe the most amazing things
about your kid, all parents want that.
They want to make sure that their kids are going to be wonderful.
Nobody wants to think that their kid
is going to be struggling with addiction.
- I think any difference you see in your child,
change of friends, drop in grades,
really isolating themselves to their rooms,
not telling you what's going on with them in their lives,
mood changes, being really angry.
The level of reaction that you get from your kid
sometimes is so out of
the norm and out of character.
And those are signs that parents see,
but a lot of times, they just say,
oh, they're just being teenagers.
Because, as parents, we always want
to think, oh that's not my kid, and it could be.
- I had started calling for treatment,
calling the school guidance counselor,
what do you know of where I can get help for my child?
This is what's going on with Brooke.
And she was absolutely floored
because she was an honor roll student.
This doesn't happen to honor roll students.
She's a good kid, she never got in any trouble.
As a parent, you have to listen to your gut feeling.
I knew something was not right
but trying to decide between a teenager
and trying to decide if something's wrong.
And addiction, which later I found out the specific signs,
but we don't really look for them
because it's not my child, couldn't possibly be doing this.
Oh, it's high school, or it's this.
So some of the signs were her friends changed.
That was the biggest one, which is the biggest sign
that everybody put.
But, of course, it was always explained away.
If your child's wearing long sleeves in the summertime,
you might want to rethink that.
If their tempers are flaring and out
of nowhere they're just, you don't see that person anymore.
Of course, once I found out she was an addict,
then I could decipher the difference
between the addict that was talking to me
and my daughter, and they were two very different people.
And I cannot stress enough to families to work together.
If Mom says, you know what, I think Jimmy's not doing,
something's wrong, Dad doesn't need to say,
oh, it's just a teen thing.
As parents, we know something.
I never in a million years expected it
to be this concoction of poison
that they're putting out here.
I call it poison, they call it opioids, Fentanyl,
you name it, it's all mixed together.
- I think the most important piece
is realizing that, as a society,
addiction is a family disease.
It's not just about the person that's using the substance.
It's about the whole family
and how their journey with their loved one
also makes them ill as well.
And so the whole family is in need of services.
And it's very easy to say, well, it's not me,
I'm not the one with the addiction.
But everybody needs help.
And as parents, I don't think we understand either
how closely we need to watch a sports injury
that could accidentally lead to an addiction
or a past surgery that people really aren't remembering
but the medication is still in the medicine cabinet.
It might not be your child that's possibly taking it,
but what about one of their friends?
I think we just have to be very mindful
about how we manage
the opioid epidemic and the availability
to especially our kids.
- Keeping your ears open, at the same time having
that compassionate, loving relationship,
open relationship, with your kids, is really important.
So knowing where your kids are going,
knowing who their friends are,
knowing who their parents of their friends are,
making sure that you have the who, what, where, why,
and how on a regular basis with your kiddos,
making sure that children understand your expectations.
Talk to your kids on a regular basis; it's so important.
One of my favorite strategies that I tell folks
when working with teenagers is go for a drive.
Teenagers don't want to necessarily look you in the face.
But if they're sitting next to you,
you can have some really amazing conversations
about what's going on in their lives with them
if they don't have to look you in the eye.
And so that has always been a good strategy
for young people and for parents.
- Having a conversation with your adolescent
and just frankly ask them the question
if they're using substances.
Sometimes, at that point, they're very honest.
And so then you talk about seeking professional help
because the biggest thing, we want to seek professional help
so we can get the screening and assessment
and the treatment planning so we can intervene
as quickly as possible.
- It's better to be safe than sorry.
And the sooner that you can begin to address issues
if they are there, the better.
It doesn't take long for especially an adolescent brain
to become addicted.
Brains aren't fully developed until they're 25.
So adolescents are particularly
at risk of making bad choices,
engage in risky behaviors, and think that nothing
is ever going to happen to them, that they're invincible.
- Know that no one else in this world
is going to support me but my parent.
And if you can't do it, find somebody else to do it.
Find a trusted family member, a trusted professional,
whether it be the Community Services Board
or another provider.
Find what works best for you and your child
because it's about survival at this point,
because once they try that drug, it's automatic addiction.
(guitar music)
- Well, I have my own history of substance use.
I am a recovering alcoholic, been sober
for a few years now.
And I thought I was done with everything,
and then in July of 2016, my little brother died
from a heroin and Fentanyl overdose.
And when that happened, I went and I changed my major
at school and decided to become a substance abuse counselor.
I'm hoping to make sure that Michael's death
wasn't for nothing.
If I can use his story
to help one kid not make that same mistake
or make one family not have to go through
what my family is going through.
He was 19, he was a cool kid.
He loved music, he really was a sweetheart.
He played football growing up,
started getting into guitar and just trying
to teach himself how to do that.
It's so weird him not being around.
And now I have a young one of my own,
and I go outside every night into my yard
and look up and try to talk to him and just be like,
ask him to watch over us.
And it's hard to
have him not be here, 'cause I know he
would've been an amazing uncle.
And I'm so sad that my son's never
going to get to know Michael.
It's changed everything.
Just life isn't the same anymore.
I just miss Michael.
(guitar music)
- So back and forth, through Brooke's treatment,
Myra would watch her everyday.
Did she do her work, did she do whatever?
She was in constant communication with her.
The amazing job that that woman did
for my daughter and the day she sent us,
hey, she's got the point, she did it,
she graduated, congratulations.
I could hear Brooke screaming through the phone,
just jumping up and down.
She was so excited that she had earned that.
And that's what they need to see.
These kids need to see that there's light
and that's it not always dark.
And they need to be shown it because they're already lost.
But thankfully, Myra Chambers and my daughter
and the Teen Treatment Center in Florida got my daughter
to graduate.
And she marched across that stage.
At rehearsal, the entire class stood up and clapped for her.
And then here I stand in 2017, and I've lost my child
because of a stupid decision.
- As a graduate of Hampton City Schools,
I care about you and your well-being.
I'm here not to check a box, not to make you feel better,
but to help you open your eyes and see.
Look around you, know your friends,
say something, do something, don't wait.
Don't think I'm going to get in trouble.
It's not about you getting in trouble.
It's about you saving your life,
your friend's life, your friend's friend's life.
Do something, say something.
(slow, dramatic music)
- She said, "I want to wake up one day
"and realize that life isn't as terrible
"as I've always thought it was.
"I want to feel happiness, not sadness,
"relief, not pain, love, not loneliness and hate.
"I could care less about how much money I make
"or how many friends I have, who likes me,
"dislikes me in life.
"If I ever want to make a change
"in the lives of others or in the world,
"I need to start with myself.
"Therefore, before my time is up,
"I just want to be okay again."
And she was working really hard at that.
So, in her words, hopefully we can make change.
(steady, serious guitar music)
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