NATIONAL HIGH SCHOOL EXAM FOR GRINGOS 1pm - 4th floor
If you arrive late you're a fricking idiot!
-We're here! We're here! -You made it on time.
Hi everyone, this is Brian Roxbury. Perhaps you know Brian from his channel, which I'll put around here.
He's visiting New York and decided to visit Fricking Idiot Studios, where we're taking the Gringo ENEM exam.
We'll be taking it together to see if we are fricking idiots.
I asked you all to send questions, and you sent like 70 questions. Shall we start?
Let's do it. I'm scared.
Question #1 is from Fernanda Oliveira from São Gonçalo, Rio de Janeiro.
What is the smallest state in Brazil?
In area?
It's definitely in the northeast.
I think it's Sergipe.
-You know Sergipe? -Oh of course!
It's either Sergipe or...it has to be Sergipe, I'm going with Sergipe.
Sergipe!
Let's stop there, one for one, 100%.
Ok, the next is from Joabe Cardoso from Santo André, São Paulo. He asked:
Is military service obligatory in Brazil?
-If it's obligatory, I know a lot of people... -Who got out of it.
But it could be true, because my friends are a bunch of scoundrels.
-I'd say no. -Impossible.
It's not.
It is!
What do you mean?
You have to go there and take the test. A lot of people don't pass the test, so they don't need to go.
They fail it on purpose so they don't have to be a solider, is that right?
There are some who sort of get out of it, if you use glasses or have respiratory problems
you don't go to basic training.
Or you go with cash in your underwear to give to them to get out of it?
No.
Lohaine Massocati Mattos from Nova Iguaçu, Rio de Janeiro:
Which countries share a border with Brazil?
-From bottom to top? -Uruguay...
...Guyana, Suriname, and the last one is France, because it's French Guiana, it's French territory.
Nine. Are there nine?
Nope! You forgot one!
Ah, Paraguay!
We should get half credit for that.
OK, fine. Half.
And the next is from Debborah Camargo: Which idiotic states refer to "bolachas" [cookie/cracker] as "biscoitos" [same thing]?
-It's not Rio de Janeiro. -No, São Paulo é biscoito.
Or Rio de Janeiro is biscoito?
Rio de Janeiro is bolacha, bolacha.
-So biscoito is São Paulo? -It's the opposite?
I can't believe I don't know if it's São Paulo or Rio. I thought that in São Paulo it was biscoito.
No, Biscoito Globo, it isn't. Bolacha, it's bolacha in São Paulo.
What a mess!
-But I don't know which other states. -I don't either.
-We don't know. -That question isn't fair.
It's Amapá, Rio de Janeiro, Espirito Santo, Bahia, Sergipe, Piauí, Maranhão, Alagoas and the Federal District.
From Carlos Magnos: What is "pindamonhangaba?"
I think it's a city.
-It's a city! -Nice
Two! We're on a roll. That could be the New Yorkese lesson later.
Ok, now it's Simone Leite from Belo Horizonte, Minas Gerais but currently in Boston.
What is the meaning of "Uai!", an interjection used by people from Minas Gerais state?
It's like when someone says something surprising and you don't agree.
That thing people from Minas Gerais say.
You're right!
The answer is: doubt, fear or surprise. Its origin is from the time of the "Inconfidência Mineira" [look it up]
that the "Inconfidentes" contacted each other with three knocks saying Uai, which stands for
Union, love and independence.
This is from Michelly Fonseca Melgaço from Rio.
What is the term for someone from Salvador, Bahia.
I know it. I know it. I can't believe I know it. I don't know exactly but it's something like "Soterpolitano".
-It's something like that. -I have no idea.
I'll go with that, Soterpolitano.
I'll give it to you, because it's "Soteropolitano".
The question is, how do I know that?
I didn't even know.
I don't know how I know these things. I need to use my brain more efficiently.
This one, right? Marcia Santos: What were the other capitals of Brazil before Brasília?
-I know it's Salvador and Rio de Janeiro, right? -I think so.
-Salvador and Rio. -Right!
Very good.
The next is from Ed Melo, also from Rio: if a Brazilian invites you to a party at 7pm,
you should arrive no earlier than...?
--I think 9pm. --9pm, right?
Is there an official answer? Doesn't it depend on the state? Because when I talk about punctuality
people from the south always say "No, in the south we're very punctual, we only arrive a half-hour late, not two..
The person is from Rio.
-I think 9pm. -9pm. -9pm.
Right! But the party only starts at 10pm.
The next one is from Wesley Santos, from Santos, São Paulo. OK.
What was the name of our country before it was Brazil, and what's the meaning of the name "Brazil."
"Brazil" is the tree, right? Brazil nut.
Yes, the wood, because they exported the wood.
The name of the country before it was Brazil was Portugal.
-Or, it was something with "States of..." like... -Like "Associated States of Whatever." -Something with "States."
Half point! The prior name was Land of Veracruz. But you were right that Brazil comes from brazilwood.
The next one is from Serginho Mezquita from Belo Horizonte.
But he lives in the U.S. Look at that, all the people from Minas Gerais living in the United States.
Do you know which Brazilian state borders the most other states?
My first impression is Minas Gerais, because it's in the center.
Or there's another that's in the northeast...
Pará? Does Pará touch a lot of states?
-Minas Gerais! -Bahia.
-BAHIA?
OK, this is from André Soares de Freitas, from Echaporã, São Paulo: What famous contemporary thinker
established the phrase "kiss on the shoulder".
-I'm not going to know that one. -Is it Anitta?
Anitta is a famous contemporary thinker? Could be!
-She's contemporary, at least. -She is. -Anitta.
Não, Valesca Popozuda. And that was a real question from the ENEM, saying that that nobody
was a contemporary thinker. That's why they asked here.
No, she's famous and contemporary, I'm just not sure of the thinker part.
This one is from Augusto Zschaber from Brasília: How is "mandioca" (yuca) popularly known in the northeast.
And in the south.
"Aipim" - is that in the south? In Rio they say "aipim." But that's not the south, that's the southeast.
But in the northeast it's called...maca-reira or maca...
-A big word that starts with m. Macageisha? Maca... -Whoa, how do you know these things?
OK, I'll go with aipim and maca.......
-And "ma...." -Macaxeira. Is that right? Thank God.
I'm going to edit this so it looks like I knew instantly.
-How is "mandioca" popularly known in the northeast? -Macaxeira! Is that right?
Priscila Tavares of Lorena, São Paulo: What animal is on the 50-real bill?
-I'm going to guess it's the jaguar. -Isn't the jaguar on the 100?
-Yeah, could be. -I think the jaguar is on the 100...
Are we permitted to use Google? OK, we'll go with jaguar.
-You got it right! -You know, Brian, we're much smarter than I thought.
At least you, right?
-The next -Is the last, from William Löffler from Porto Alegre,
Rio Grande do Sul. Seth and Brian: Did you know that the longest beach in the world is in Brazil,
according to the Guinness Book?
What is its name and what state is it in?
-It must be in the northeast. -It starts with a C.
-With what? -C, that's a little hint. You'll never get it.
-Cearanambica Beach. -It's in Minas Gerais.
The name of the beach is Praia do Cassino, in Rio Grande do Sul, its 220 kilometers long.
Ok, well, how many did we get right?
More than half. I think that merits a "high cinco."
NEW YORKESE CLASS
Don't forget to subscribe to Brian's channel, on our channel too, of course, and what else?
Oh, a quick New Yorkese class. I said "on a roll" - we were on a roll, which in theory means "on bread"
since rolls are a kind of bread. But that's not it, it's "roll" as in "to turn". It's like everything is going well,
We're getting them all right. Ah, then we weren't on a roll.
-But nine is pretty good right? -Very good.
Thanks folks, for sending all those questions - sorry to those who sent questions that we didn't use,
-but it was already hard enough. OK! Bye! -Bye folks!
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