Hi, I'm Jess from Nurturearly and this is the
video for Please Please Stop Crying:
A guide to soothing your baby when you
think you've tried everything.
This video goes alongside a downloadable
PDF they both have the same content,
it's just a matter of which way you want to
view it, if you want to read it or if you
want to watch the video. Now crying is a
really big part of early years
development. It's really the only way
your baby knows how to communicate with
you especially for the first three months.
After that, they're a little more
engaged with facial expressions and
there's a little bit more ways to
communicate with their bodies but
ultimately until they start talking,
and even then, they are going to be crying.
As far as babies are concerned there are a
few key reasons why they do cry.
Let's just think about it for a second
a brand-new baby who's come out of the
womb where they had a really sweet setup
it was warm, their food was taking care of,
waste is taking care of, didn't even
have to breathe - all that is brand new to them.
So, it's no wonder they're a little
bit faster when they come out. They have
a lot of new things to deal with.
But crying, real, full on, big mouth, squinty
eyes, red face, crying happened for three
main reasons: hunger, tiredness and
discomfort. And discomfort can be broken
down into a few different categories but
before we explore that, let me just encourage
you that before we dive into a guide that's
all about crying the first few months of
time with your baby are beautiful.
There's going to be all kinds of firsts,
there's gonna be all kinds of really
lovely time.
So even though crying is a big part, try
to make sure that you enjoy all of
really gorgeous parts too.
Let's look at crying though. The first one
is baby trying to tell you 'Mom, I'm hungry".
Given how rapidly baby is developing,
they need lots of feedingsm plus they
have really tiny stomachs so they're
constantly waking up to try to eat.
They used to have this sweet delivery system
that would just do it all for them but
now they actually have to participate
and so they get a little bit cranky when
they feel hungry. It's a new sensation and
it's very uncomfortable for a little one.
So many times babies are crying because
they're hungry especially if they're
waking up.
But babies are also quite clever and
they can use signals for those
in-between feeds about 'I think I'd like a
little more to eat here mom' before they
get all the way to crying of 'Mom, I'm
really hungry now.'
So let's look at those a little bit.
The first sign your baby will give you
that they're looking for feed is:
the mouth comes open and they kind of move
their head side to side.
This is a really good indicator that
baby is looking for food and it's great
that they're taking the initiative!
This is great signal of 'Mom, I'm hungry'
without crying, and if you get to that feeding
at this stage you avoid the crying
altogether which is kind of a bonus.
But even if you missed that signal they
still have one more before they get all
the way to crying. The second signal
after they've been turning your head
kind of looking for the food, they will
start doing something that kind of looks
like stretching - the arms go up, the legs
go out, the back curls a little bit, but
the really really key signal is that
their hand starts coming to their mouth
and they're looking for something to
suck on.
If you happen to miss these two signals,
that's okay, sometimes you're not always around -
baby's woken up and you were doing
something in the other room or your
folding laundry and you just
didn't happen to catch the signal.
That's okay! But if you do get all the way to
crying, the easiest thing you can do is try
to soothe baby first - cuddles,
rubs on the back, help them to settle down
before they try to feed. This will have
so much more success than trying to just
hustle around and try to get them
sorted and everybody's a bit flustered.
Take a beat - make sure everybody's
comfortable and then start the feed.
If you have a really big eater though,
you may find that a snuggling and a cuddle
is not what baby wants, they just want to
get right into it. So it is different for
different babies. Figure out what's going on
with your little one and how you can best
help them when they're crying because
they're hungry.
The best-case scenario though is to try
to get to feedings before crying.
This is a battle that you can win, baby is
always going to cry when they're trying
to communicate with you and if you can
try to feed them before they're crying
for hunger, that's a big win
and a lot of crying that
you have assuaged and aren't going to
have to deal with and feel stressed about.
The next reason baby might be crying
is they are tired.
Babies sleep a lot.
They are growing so rapidly, they need
a lot of rest but, because of those tiny
tummies, they also need lots of feeding
and so that 16 to 17 hours that newborns
sleep in a 24-hour period gets
interrupted a lot and baby used to get
put down frequently so that they're
getting enough rest. Just like feeding,
we want to get a jump on not having baby
crying because they're tired.
This is especially important because
overtired babies become even more alert
and it's harder and harder to put them
down as they become overtired.
So as baby get sleepy that you want to
start getting into whatever routine it is that
you do before baby goes down and help
them to get settled before they get
overtired.
There's a big difference between sleepy
and tired. I'm sure you know that feeling.
Sleepy is like i'm curled up in a
sunbeam and I feel cozy and I could
close my eyes for a few minutes because
I feel just so comfortable. Tired is like
I need coffee now I'm so grumpy.
So we want to try to get baby into bed
or into their sleep area while they're
still in that cozy feeling and not in the
grumpy feeling. Whatever your sleep time
routine is try to make it as soothing
and non-stimulating as possible.
This will really help baby with cues
and will also help them if they have
gotten into a little bit of an overtired phase.
It's very difficult to start soothing
a baby as they've already gotten
over-tired because they just keep getting
more and more upset. But if you have
really good routines that are soothing,
that they know are good cues, like
'Yes I am able to go to sleep now, I am
feeling tired. It would actually just
feel really good if I could just ease
into some sleep right now' that would be
really helpful. So rocking, cuddling,
kisses, things that are really just going
to help baby to be warm and comfortable
and go right off to sleep.
There are all kinds of ways to set up
a good sleep time routine.
I cover a lot of those in the course
Mastering Eat, Poop, Sleep, Repeat
so if you are at all interested in
figuring out how you can best setup a
routine for your little one
go ahead and check out that course.
And the number three reason
baby is crying is 'Mom I'm uncomfortable'
is what they're trying to tell you.
And this could be a whole range of
things so sometimes a little bit tricky
to narrow things down and this is where
"I think I've tried everything" really
comes into play because it's kind of
easy to go to: does baby need to eat?
Is baby clean? Is baby tired?
Those are usually your big three
but uncomfortable can cover
a wide variety of things.
Baby might need to burp so that kind of
comes into 'Mom I'm hungry and now
I'm uncomfortable' so you've had crying
because they're hungry and now they're
crying because they're uncomfortable and
everyone's getting really upset.
But it might also be other things like:
wind, digestive issues, temperature - baby
is feeling too hot or too cold,
over-stimulation, under-stimulation,
baby just isn't feeling well maybe they're
they've got a little bit of a bug or
something is paining them. These are all
possibilities of why baby is feeling
uncomfortable. So let's look at each of
them individually to help you get a better
idea of how to narrow down what making
baby cry.
We're going to cover all of those little
uncomfortable things for baby in the
next video. I look forward to
seeing you there!
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